Definitely getting swampy around here

A book cover with an image of an alligator and text reading Swamp Story, a novel, Dave Barry

In case you hadn’t heard, the upcoming (January 2024) Key West Literary Seminar will focus on Florida. And we have one hell of a lineup so it’s worth booking now. Hard to believe we were all trying to stay warm at the last one, with the “feels like” temperatures reaching the triple digits around here even before we officially reached summer.

On a recent roadtrip, my husband Mark and I did some prep by listening to Dave Barry’s new novel, Swamp Story. If you read and liked Big Trouble - or even just watched the excellent movie adaptation of it - this is one well worth a read. Or a listen - Dave reads it himself and does a fantastic job. It’s Florida absurdity in the best Elmore Leonard-Carl Hiaasen spirit and because it’s Dave Barry it’s funny as hell. He’s so funny he won a freaking Pulitzer, and I’ve always loved his work best when he’s taking a swipe at something serious. My all-time favorite of his columns was when he covered the Clarence Thomas confirmation hearings and he was good enough to keep that one on his website because God knows it would take Indiana Jones to unearth it from the Herald archives. In the new book, there is some nice, subtle shade thrown at the New York Times and its climate change reporting which doesn’t sound all that funny but it is. It really, really is.

This is an especially good book to listen to if you’re doing a Florida roadtrip, which we were - we even drove back on Tamiami Trail, where much of the action takes place, so that was a fun meta-moment. It’s so good that I enjoyed it even though I was experiencing a migraine. Really! It helped that Mark was driving and I could just shut my eyes to avoid the light and motion and whatever else was setting off the evil pulsing in my brain. But this story was definitely a helpful distraction. Thank you, Dave, and see you in January.

Fewer than 50 links about That Book

I read Fifty Shades of Grey. Hey, it was for my job! So I could discuss the most popular book in the nation with patrons! Nothing to do with dirty bits and kinky sexual practices. Honest!

And I'm afraid I'm late enough to this show that I don't have much say about the book that hasn't been said. No, it's not very well written. But neither, in my opinion, are many other bestselling works of fiction (I'm still waiting for the International Court of Literary Justice to convene and give me back the four hours I spent reading Angels & Demons). Mostly, it struck me as oddly retro, a throwback to the romances referred to these days as Old School -- of the Kathleen Woodiwiss/Rosemary Rogers 1970s-80s school. No rape scenes, thank God, but a lot of the touchstones were there. The heroine is virginal and insecure. The hero is dominant (literally, in this case), but tortured by his past, yet still able to recognize virginal heroine's stunning beauty when no one else had noticed. And also induce her to multiple orgasms the first time out. And like a lot of the older romances, it's epic in length -- three books at more than 500 pages each. And I feel confident that the vast majority of its readers understand this is a fantasy. Lots of us think of ourselves as insecure but goodhearted people -- and wouldn't it be nice if the one person who recognized our qualities was an incredibly goodlooking billionaire who flies his own helicopter and practices global philanthropy and is extremely good at sex, even if he has some serious issues -- that only you can help him get past? Like I said, fantasy. Just like vampires, dragons, elves and whatever that guy does in all those Clive Cussler novels that fly off the library shelves. (5/23 update: See last link below for an opposing view on this issue.)

So instead of opining further about the book or trying to diagnose the social factors behind its unlikely and astonishing success, I'll simply share a few links worth reading if you're curious.

It was better when ... wait, it's still pretty damn cool

My review of Mile Marker Zero: The Moveable Feast of Key West ran in the Miami Herald today . The book chronicles a very interesting moment in the cultural history of the island and, to some extent, the nation. For another, longer and in some ways more positive review, check out this one from The Wall Street Journal. The book made me think a lot about some of my longtime obsessions -- in ways that weren't really down to the merits of the book so I didn't address them in the review. That's why I have a blog, right? First, there's the nostalgia thing, specifically the baby boomer nostalgia thing. If you're a Gen X-er, as I am, you grew up with -- and are still dealing with -- the overwhelming, overbearing weight of the giant generation before you that set the cultural norms and insists, to this day, that their music/writers/political opinions/lifestyle choices are superior to yours and should continue their culturally dominant positions for ... well, apparently forever. My college newspaper had a reunion in the early 1990s, drawing people who had been staffers from throughout the paper's recent history -- someone brilliant made up coffee mugs with the slogan "It was better when we were there." Exactly. I am not arguing that the 1970s in Key West were not a remarkable moment for many reasons, not least the cultural convergence that saw Thomas McGuane, Jim Harrison and I guess Jimmy Buffett drawn to the same small island at the same time. But it's the notion that this was some paradise that has been lost, that there was a golden age when everything was better -- and the conclusion that everything happening now just sucks that irritates me.

Related to which is the question of Key West's authenticity, something with which anyone who chooses to live here longterm must wrestle. In Mile Marker Zero, McKeen describes present-day Key West  as having been "embalmed as an alcoholic theme park" and his main character, Tom Corcoran, finds that "the quaintness and weirdness that Corcoran found when he stepped off the plane in 1968 had largely been institutionalized." I can see why you'd think that. Key West can appear as a theme park with a strong alcoholic bent, as a hippie version of an Amish community, as a tacky cruise ship stop. But that's only if you see the place at its most superficial, namely Lower Duval Street. Key West has tons of authenticity and it's not that hard to find -- it's at Sandy's Cafe and Five Brothers. It's at the bocce courts and the high school baseball field and and Lucky Street Gallery and the Green Parrot. It's at the library and the Holiday Parade and the Porch and the MARC Christmas tree sale and Bad Boy Burrito and the Burlesque. True, it has a high tolerance for alcohol and other behaviors that get people into trouble -- but that stems from a culture that is remarkably nonjudgmental and open to new things and unconventional lifestyles. People are constantly coming and going. Lots of them are short-timers, some of them are scammers, some have ridiculously unrealistic ideas of what they can do here. But a few stay on and add interesting new layers to the place. If you're from here, you can draw on a tightknit community of surviving natives who have learned to adapt to the constant changes and know things about the island that we newcomers will never figure out, no matter how long we're here. If you're from elsewhere, you get to reinvent yourself as you choose, as an adult. Despite what McKeen says, it is not "millionaires and the homeless and hardly anyone in between" -- most of the interesting stuff is in between and there's plenty of it. And despite what Mrs. Buffett and Mrs. McGuane and Tom Corcoran may think/have thought, it is a fine place to raise children. Some of the coolest people I know grew up here -- and kids regularly go off the rails in affluent suburbs, wholesome rural communities and elite private schools. People sometimes ask me if I plan to stay in Key West forever (I don't plan that long-term but have no plans to leave at the moment) or why I've stayed. My answer is always the same: It's a small town that's never boring. I'm sure this exists elsewhere and I imagine it might be nice to live somewhere with a lower level of drunken idiocy. I might find another community with as many smart, funny, interesting people where I can ride my bike to my job, the movies, my friends' homes and any number of interesting restaurants. But I kind of doubt it.

Santas in July

Late July in Key West means a couple things. It's hotter than Hades. You start seeing interesting blobs on satellite images of the Atlantic. If you live in my house, you spend most of your nonworking waking time watching the Tour de France. And if you hang around Old Town, you suddenly have sightings of Santa wherever you look. Only it's not supposed to be Santa. The hale white-bearded fellows are entrants in the annual Ernest Hemingway Look-Alike Contest, a guaranteed publicity winner for the tourism council (and I've been as guilty as anyone; I once wrote a cover story called "The Papas and the Papas" for the late, lamented Tropic magazine, chronicling one year's contest). An earlier story I wrote about Hemingway's long, strong, posthumous celebrity pointed out that Amherst doesn't hold Emily Dickinson lookalike contests -- only now they do.

I've always hoped one year the winner would be the rare entrant who looks like the younger, darker-haired, nonbearded Hemingway -- as Hemingway looked when he actually lived here in the 1930s. You do get the occasional entrant who gives it a try but since previous winners serve as the judges, the late-Hemingway look appears to have a lock on the thing.

All of which is a longwinded introduction to a couple of recent book reviews, one of which has a strong Hemingway connection: My review of A Skeptic's Guide to Writers' Houses ran in Sunday's edition of Solares Hill. And a couple Sundays before that they ran my review of Janet Malcolm's Iphigenia in Forest Hills. Both interesting, well reported and written books of nonfiction, though naturally very different. I liked the Malcolm book a lot about the court system; not so much with her pronounciations on journalism. And I liked Trubek's tour of writers' house museums though she was a bit snarky in approach at times. I hadn't realized how many of these museums I had toured until I really thought about it though to be fair two of them are in my backyards, past and present (Emily Dickinson and Ernest Hemingway, whom Trubek holds up as sort of polar opposite of house museum ethos).

Like many a Key Wester, I'm almost as sick of Ernest Hemingway as I am of Jimmy Buffett -- but lately I've been thinking it might be time to read him again. One reason is the hilarious portrayal in Woody Allen's recent movie "Midnight in Paris" -- young Hemingway again, before he was the self-created celebrity and legend. Another is simply in reaction to all the late-Hemingway hysteria; I haven't read the short stories and early novels since I was in my 20s and I have learned that books take on a whole new dimension when you bring some life experience to them. Maybe it's time for A Farewell to Arms. After I finish re-reading Jane Austen.